Right enough of these “2020 vision” jokes
I don’t want to make a spectacle of myself
thefun
I haven’t showered since last decade.
What do you mean it’s not 2020 yet?
The average person has sex 54 times a year…
Tomorrow is gonna be wild!
No pair of balls are identical.
In fact, there are vas deferenses between the two.
Scientists removed the right half of a man’s noggin…
Scientists removed the right half of a man’s noggin and then, they asked him to count to ten. The man counted, “two, four, six, eight,… Read More »Scientists removed the right half of a man’s noggin…
At a bar, my friend made a remarkable shot in pool and I asked how he did it.
He said, “When I am about to take a shot, it’s like magic, I can just see the line where I need to shoot.”Then he… Read More »At a bar, my friend made a remarkable shot in pool and I asked how he did it.
Does your face hurt?
Because its killing me
Need help
Ok, so this isn’t about the game but I need r/HollowKnight icon.
This year, my New Years resolution is to finally go to the gym…
… and cancel that membership I’m been wasting money on every month since last year.
Weatherman are like that over aggressive guy at the bar…
…always telling us how many inches we are going to get and always failing to deliver.
What is Henry Cavill’s least favourite game?
PortalEdit: Thanks for the coin, kind redditor!
Three vampires walk into a bar
Bartender asks “What can I get ya?”The first vampire says “I’d like a Bloody Mary.” Second vampire, “I’ll take a Blood on the Rocks.” On… Read More »Three vampires walk into a bar
Where does a mansplainer get his water?
From a well, actually
I told Sam not to sing on his phone…
But Samsung anyway :/
A nurse, a doctor, and an anti-vaxxer walk into a bar.
The nurse sits down at the bar and says, “I’ll have a Bloody Mary!”The doctor sits next to her and says, “Give me a rum… Read More »A nurse, a doctor, and an anti-vaxxer walk into a bar.
A young Mexican man named Jose was curious about America so he snuck across the border
He wanted to go see a baseball game so when he went home, he could tell his family all about it. When he got there,… Read More »A young Mexican man named Jose was curious about America so he snuck across the border
Two fish are in a tank
One fish says to the other and says, “How the fuck do you drive this?”
Why did the condom fly across the room??
It got pissed off!
I want to tell you about a girl who only ate plants…
You’ve probably never heard of herbivore.
My taxi driver asked me what I did for a living.
Me: work as a web developer and also part time as a graphic designer.Driver: I don’t like working for anyone, I like to be my… Read More »My taxi driver asked me what I did for a living.
How does a werewolf make bechamel sauce?
They start with a rooooooooouuuuuuuux!
I heard the atheists are trying to get tax exempt status now
they are a non-prophet organization
From my 92 year old uncle. “Times have changes so much, back in my day it was still perfectly fine to say black paint”.
Nowdays you are supposed to say “Would you please paint the fence Jamal”.
What has four letters, sometimes has nine, but never has five?
Woops meant to use a period.
My grandma said that we people are too much reliant on technology.
I called her a hypocrite and unplugged her life support.
What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
A roamin’ catholic
I threw a boomerang a few years ago.
I now live in constant fear.
My friend asked me what the name of that famous ice cube movie was.
I replied, “Titanic?”.
What’s the difference between a lightsaber and pants with insults written on them?
One is disarming, the other is diss leggings.