An actual conversation I heard today
Kid: so everyone in my family has brown eyes, but I have blue, why is that?Science teacher: oh, that’s what we call the “mailman theory”
Fun jokes
Funny jokes for every mood, all gathered in one place. This is the heart of TheFun.Net, a growing collection of the best jokes we have found and loved, from quick one-liners to longer stories worth the read. New funny jokes land here all the time, so there is always a fresh reason to smile.
Why do horse-girls like horses so much?
Because it’s the only stable relationship they’ll ever have!
I asked my wife if i was the only one she’s been with.
She said, “Yes, the others were at least sevens or eights”.
I went to watch the new Jumanji movie today.
That was some next level stuff.
What did Hillary say today while sipping her tea?
Mmmm. Peach mint.
A group of teachers of different subjects have entered a contest to see who is the best…
…after battling each other in several one v one quiz rounds the Math teacher finds herself in the finale! She then turns to the other… Read More »A group of teachers of different subjects have entered a contest to see who is the best…
Hey is your dad in prison?
Cause if I was your dad I’d sure be in prison
The “ladies and gentlemen, we got em” meme is one of the best of the decade
Change my state of mind
Why do archaeologists always drink beer?
Their careers are in ruins!
Did you hear about the part-time chemist?
He only worked periodically
A farmer walk into a bar [LONG]
A farmer walks into a bar asks for a pint of beer. The bartender brings the man his beer, and walks away. As the farmer… Read More »A farmer walk into a bar [LONG]
Do you want to know why the republicans won’t impeach Trump?
Because they believe in carrying a baby to full term.
Of course the Republican-led Senate won’t convict Trump.
They insist on carrying a baby to full term.
How to retire at the age of 18.
Get a job at a tire shop.
I took a lie detector test
When I said my second name the detector exploded.
RIP Usain Bolt
Usain Bolt has been struck by lightning. It comes as a huge shock to not only himself, but also his family and friends!
Urainas
Theres a wall of planets in my school so every time we all past i shout YOUR ANUS IS ON THE WALL
Did you hear about the gay sewage worker?
He doesn’t mind a squirter.
Flat earthers used to think that the earth was round
But since then they’ve really ironed out their theory
A burglar stole all of my lamps.
I should be upset, But right now I’m delighted.
Two old Jews are walking past a church
A sign out front reads, “Convert to Catholicism, get $20.”The first Jew keeps walking, but soon notices his friend has stopped to take a closer… Read More »Two old Jews are walking past a church
Yo mama’s so fat
I took me all four fingers to swipe left in tinder.
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand by itself?
It was two tired
Why don’t Americans switch from pounds to killograms all at once?
Because it will cause mass confusion
your slogan says “when you’re here, you’re family”
Olive Garden Waiter: Sir, I am not adding you to my will.
I thought of an appropriate parody: James and the giant impeachment.
Ain’t that just peachy.
Animated cartoon squirrels are metaphors for the best soulmates.
They’ll do anything for love, and go Hammy on your cookie or Scrat on your nut.
Just dropped a copy of “A Christmas Carol” on my toe.
It hurts like the Dickens!
Mon, people keep sayin’ dat President Trump is impeached.
I tink im oranged.
If the earth is flat…
Then how come my soda is still fizzy?