the cure
These new anti-depressants I got from the doctor are brilliant. I felt much better as soon as I put a dozen in my wife’s food.
Fun jokes
Funny jokes for every mood, all gathered in one place. This is the heart of TheFun.Net, a growing collection of the best jokes we have found and loved, from quick one-liners to longer stories worth the read. New funny jokes land here all the time, so there is always a fresh reason to smile.
unrealistic
Porn is so unrealistic. I’ve been watching for 20 minutes now and no one has checked their phone.
sent from
A guy from Apple promised me a pre-release of a new product if I sucked his cock this morning. As if I would compromise my… Read More »sent from
what day is it
during a random drugs test i got asked “have you consumed alcohol in the past 24 hours?” as i look back on it now i… Read More »what day is it
exactly
Me at work: “don’t talk to me until I have my coffee” Colleague: “but you don’t even drink coffee!” Me: “exactly”
who is this
Hillary Clinton goes to her doctor for a physical, only to find out that she’s pregnant. She is furious… Here she’s in the middle of… Read More »who is this
Broke people shopping: “Wow!
Broke people shopping: “Wow! This is the *sees price tag* ugliest shirt I’ve ever seen “
There is a town in Norway called Hell.
There is a town in Norway called Hell. It freezes over almost every winter.
for mama
Maria had just gotten married and being a traditional Italian, she was still a virgin. So, on her wedding night, staying at her mother’s house,… Read More »for mama
argument
I seriously hate it when a couple starts having an argument in front of you. They could have least waited until I got dressed and… Read More »argument
Saw a boat with a sign that read, “For Sale”, so I added the…
Saw a boat with a sign that read, “For Sale”, so I added the missing “-ing”……..Idiots.
free trial
High school is like a free trial on education and then once you’ve graduated they say, “Ok now if you want to continue, please pay… Read More »free trial
never
I might be going to hell, but my at least my coffee will never get cold.
reward
If I find out who sent my wife a large bouquet of flowers today, I’m going to beat their ass. ….The stupid bitch thought it… Read More »reward
Your secrets are safe with me, I wasn’t even listening to you.
Your secrets are safe with me, I wasn’t even listening to you.
I Gave your girlfriend an oral mammogram.
I Gave your girlfriend an oral mammogram.
remaining
Yawning is your bodies way of saying 20% battery remaining.
trying
I will never forget my teachers.. but I will keep on trying.
the first
Barack Obama…. The first black presidennt and he starts selling weed.
t-shirt
A dentist friend of mine had a T-shirt which said on the front: Let me put my tool in your mouth… and on the back:…and… Read More »t-shirt
I was going to go to the gym but I got exhausted trying to…
I was going to go to the gym but I got exhausted trying to parallel parking.
freak
No, I don’t want to come to your cat’s birthday party…you freak. My dog’s getting married that weekend.
Officer: “Blow into this” JB: *starts unzipping officers pants*…
Officer: “Blow into this” JB: *starts unzipping officers pants* Officer: “No! No! WTF!?”
don’t forget
A very attractive young woman came up to me today and asked me to get her a drink. Then I remembered. I was serving behind… Read More »don’t forget
what to say
I got fired at work today. My boss said my communication skills were awful. I didn’t know what to say to that.
texting
I am surprised my girlfriend failed her driving test. She texted me like 3 times telling me everything was going good.
everything
Our little girl is growing up! Monica Lewinsky turned 50 recently. It seems like only yesterday that she was crawling around the White House on… Read More »everything
good signal
Just as I was thinking that technology ruined the art of conversation, my date looked up at me and smiled. “This is a fantastic restaurant,”… Read More »good signal
“Careful, there’s poop on the dance floor.” -How ballet was…
“Careful, there’s poop on the dance floor.” -How ballet was invented.
taste
I have good taste I just don’t have the money to prove it!