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Jokes

  • From my Boobliography

    What do you call all the boobs you have ever seen in your life?
    Memmaries…

  • High four

    How do you know if you bought good fireworks ?
    the owner of the store gives you a high four

  • One of the best jokes

  • I believe in love at first sight…

    I believe in love at first sight…
    But science calls it an erection.

  • One of my books just had a four-star review!

    One of my books just had a four-star review!
    The reviewer said “This book is ****”

  • Unexpectedly early

    So the other day my wife unexpectedly came home early from work and asked me if I wanted to play Monopoly with her. I agreed but while we were playing, I caught her cheating. I called her out on it and she just shrugged and said, “if you’re not cheating, you’re not trying!” That’s when her sister burst out of the closet and said to my wife, “thank God you’re cool with it, I thought I was going to be stuck in there for hours!”

  • not fair

    Alcohol manufacturers are killing their best customers.

  • No Porn Hub, I don’t want to play online poker I’m at work

    No Porn Hub, I don’t want to play online poker
    I’m at work

  • Motivation

    Wish me luck. I’m doing the London Marathon again this year.
    Last year I managed only 3 hours and 20 mins…
    before I got bored and switched to a different channel.

  • Pull ups

    I’ve done a hundred pull ups today…..

    This new belt is a crap!