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Her home
As my daughter was walking out the door to go on her first date, in my best grumpy old tough guy dad voice, I growled, “I want her home before midnight.” The boy she was going with stopped dead in his tracks, turned slowly around and with wide eyes replied….
“But you already own her home!”
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Raise your right foot
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Amazing universe
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My wife and I have an open relationship.
My wife and I have an open relationship. Found out last night.
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Took grandma to a Chinese restaurant yesterday.
Took grandma to a Chinese restaurant yesterday. She used her chopsticks to knit a sweater out of her noodles.
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Me: “When I die, I want to die making love.” Wife: “At least it…
Me: “When I die, I want to die making love.”
Wife: “At least it will be a very quick death.”
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I’ve gotten a lot stronger the past year, it used to take me 3…
I’ve gotten a lot stronger the past year, it used to take me 3 trips to carry $100 worth of groceries, now I can do it in 1 trip only using 1 hand. ?
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The lady next to me on this roller-coaster is screaming at the…
The lady next to me on this roller-coaster is screaming at the top of her lungs! Damn, it’s like she’s never seen a penis before.
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Keep trying
our Boss said ” we will continue having these meetings every day until I find out why no work is being done ! “
Jokes
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