my turn
I told my wife to spin the globe, put her finger on it and wherever it lands that will be the holiday destination. ”Ooooo!” she… Read More »my turn
Marriage Jokes
Marriage jokes about husbands, wives, weddings and anniversaries. Funny truths about married life that every couple will recognize.
reminder
Sometimes, my secretary reminds me of my wife. I was unbuttoning her shirt the other day when she said, “Remember, you have a wife.”
fired
One day a man returns home to his wife telling her that he was fired from his job at a deli mart. His wife asked why and he said, “after all the years I have worked there, I have always wanted to stick my penis into the meat grinder, and today was the day I completely lost my patience and finaly stuck it in there.
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surprise lunch
Put in an official complaint at work the other day after finding someone had shit in my lunchbox, and they immediately launched an investigation. Turned… Read More »surprise lunch
scheme
I went to great effort to kill my wife recently, with a completely untraceable poison obtained from a plant that grows for just two weeks on the eastern side of a Peruvian mountain.Read More »scheme
present
Wife:”Don’t open that wardrobe! your birthday present is in there!” Me:*opening the door*”Too late…this is the stupidest present ever!” Me: “Why the fuck would I… Read More »present
master
My wife cames home to find me watching the football game…. Wife: “you turn that game off and go and do the dishes!! Me: *throwing… Read More »master
cheers
Here’s to our wives and girlfriends!….. may they never meet!
fantasy
My husband asked me to dress up as a nurse tonight to fulfill his fantasy… that we have health insurance.
procedure
Yesterday I went through a costly and painful procedure that required me to have my spine and both testicles removed. Still, I got some fantastic… Read More »procedure