money for sex
Wife: Do you wanna have sex? Me: Yeah, I thought you’d never ask Wife: Ok here’s £40 and there’s a brothel around the corner.
Marriage Jokes
Marriage jokes for anyone who has said I do and lived to laugh about it. From nagging spouses to selective hearing and the joys of a shared bank account, these husband and wife jokes poke fun at wedded life in all its glory. Read a few to your other half, if you dare.
not to lie
I said to my husband “Why don’t you tell me you love me?” He said “For fuck sake woman, I can’t win, you told me… Read More »not to lie
time to stop
I keep getting bombarded with emails about penis enlargement. I wish my wife would stop it.
surprise
Pretty sure I know what my wife’s getting me for my birthday cause when I guessed, “A 3-way?” she got all angry like I ruined… Read More »surprise
to the right place
My wife called me today to tell me that the car wouldn’t start. I said, “Honey, when I’m not there you have to sit in… Read More »to the right place
it’s time
I started arguing with my gf a lot, we rarely have sex anymore and we can’t stand each other either… I think we’re ready to… Read More »it’s time
Highway to Hell is a great song because you can play it at both…
Highway to Hell is a great song because you can play it at both your wedding and your funeral.
different
My wife said, “Honey, let’s do something different tonight.” “What did you have in mind?” I asked. “I want you to imagine I’m a slutty… Read More »different
nice name
I always wanted to name my first daughter after my first love… but my wife thinks that “nutella” is not the right name for her!!
waiting
Inside every fat woman there is a thin woman. Inside every thin woman there is a fat woman waiting for marriage.