My wife asked what I wanted for Valentine’s Day.
My wife asked what I wanted for Valentine’s Day. I said I wanted a blowjob. She’s all, “no silly, something I can buy you.” So… Read More »My wife asked what I wanted for Valentine’s Day.
Marriage Jokes
Marriage jokes about husbands, wives, weddings and anniversaries. Funny truths about married life that every couple will recognize.
the cure
These new anti-depressants I got from the doctor are brilliant. I felt much better as soon as I put a dozen in my wife’s food.
for mama
Maria had just gotten married and being a traditional Italian, she was still a virgin. So, on her wedding night, staying at her mother’s house,… Read More »for mama
reward
If I find out who sent my wife a large bouquet of flowers today, I’m going to beat their ass. ….The stupid bitch thought it… Read More »reward
freak
No, I don’t want to come to your cat’s birthday party…you freak. My dog’s getting married that weekend.
too honest
My husband and I went for marriage counseling this morning. The counselor told me I need to be more open with him about what I… Read More »too honest
harder
We’re at the age in our life when the wife says, “Dave, I want it harder!” I reply, “Ok babe, what’s the gross national product… Read More »harder
woman of my dreams
My horoscope says I will meet the woman of my dreams today. Not sure how my wife will take the news but I’m pretty damn… Read More »woman of my dreams
woman of my dreams
My horoscope says I will meet the woman of my dreams today. Not sure how my wife will take the news but I’m pretty damn… Read More »woman of my dreams
money for sex
Wife: Do you wanna have sex? Me: Yeah, I thought you’d never ask Wife: Ok here’s £40 and there’s a brothel around the corner.