Welcome to our dirty jokes collection, more than 400 of the filthiest and funniest adult jokes we could round up in one place. Expect NSFW one-liners, X-rated puns and cheeky gags made for grown-ups with a dark sense of humor. For the best of them sorted by topic, start with our 200 dirty jokes for adults. New dirty jokes get added all the time, so bookmark the page and check back. Strictly 18+ and definitely not one for the family dinner table.
They came to a unanimous decision that they would pay a visit to a couple of prostitutes at a local whorehouse they had found out… Read More »Two midgets were having a discussion one night about their ever dwindling memories of the last time they had sex.
Because it curls when it gets cold.
The Great Wall of vagina
Cos he was an artichoke.
Soon after her husband pulled the doctor aside and asked him “How soon until we can have sex”?The doctor smiled and replied “I can meet… Read More »A women just gave birth
One’s a crusty busstation, the other’s a busty crustation.
She said every time we have sex a joke comes to her
Unfortunately, my dick.
Never going to have sex in the middle of the highway anymore.
For example, every time one was in the mood for sex, they would say to the other: “can you please help me type a letter… Read More »A couple with kids had made a pact that they would always fulfill each other’s physical desires every time they were in the mood. They had also thought of a secret way of communicating with each-other so that the kids would not understand..
“Dad, I got naked at the store!” I told him.“Son, your an idiot”
Every naked person turns me on!
Barry returned from a doctor’s visit one day and told his wife Carol that the doctor said he only had 24 hours to live. Wiping… Read More »24 Hours to Live
One of them shucks between fits.
[SERIOUS] [TRIGGER WARNING] The only reason why I broke up with you was because of how poorly you treated me. You never loved me. You… Read More »I thought I loved you until you started to show off your true self.
Im working on a story about a gay puppet who wishes he were human. everytime he tells a lie his penis gets bigger. Im going… Read More »ITALIANS WILL GET THIS
I need to give her a charger too.
They have a certain ‘Je ne sais quack’
Boudreaux walked past a pet shop every day on his way to work. He saw this nice looking parrot and decided to ask the shop… Read More »Boudreaux and the parrot (LONG)
One is avoiding sex, and the other is avoiding sects.
She said, “Just once, could you give me silver-medal sex and finish second?”
There were these really irritating guys that made me want to strangle the life out of their bodies. I asked her if she could beat… Read More »So there was this one prostitute that said she would do anything for money…
All porn films should start with 5 seconds of music, to remind me that my volume is turned up. ???
I have only one word for women that want to treat me like a sex object… Hey
How many Freudian analysts does it take to change a light bulb? Two, one to change the bulb and one to hold the penis…..LADDER! I… Read More »How many Freudian analysts does it take to change a light bulb?
A man wakes up in a hospital bed… The nurse says, I have some bad news. You won’t be able to feel anything from the… Read More »JOKESTER
You know you’re getting old when you’re watching porn and you think to yourself “That bed looks really comfortable…”
I thiink that anal sex should be reserved for marriage only because marriage is a prison.
The wife rang me at the pub giggling, “The kids are at mums, I’ve got a bottle of Chardonnay, and I’m in my sexy new… Read More »JOKESTER
Women can use sex to get what they want. Men can’t because, well, what they want is sex.