A man walks into a bar. You already know this is going to be good. Our bar jokes collection is packed with classic pub humor, bartender gags and drinking jokes that get funnier with every round. Grab a stool, order something strong, and scroll through the funniest bar jokes on the internet.
New scientific evidence has come to light that one beer takes nine minutes off your life. According to my calculations, I died sometime in September… Read More »New scientific evidence has come to light that one beer takes…
Alcohol: Post it, it’s fuckin hilarious. Sobriety: WTF?…I’m never drinking again.
The wife rang me at the pub giggling, “The kids are at mums, I’ve got a bottle of Chardonnay, and I’m in my sexy new… Read More »JOKESTER
“Can I have a double Jack and coke please?” I slurred. “Don’t you think you’ve had enough, sir?” He replied. “What? Listen dickhead, I could… Read More »Enough
This girl was chatting me up at the pub. “So, what do you do for a living?” she asked, batting her eyelids over her glass.”… Read More »Boxer
“I’m going to pay for this in the morning,” I slurred after downing a bottle of whiskey. “No you’re not,” said the shop keeper.
Isn’t it funny, you stop drinking cause you want to settle down and have kids. Then you have the little fuckers and all you want… Read More »Irony
I didn’t have alcohol for a week and got a text from my Liver, “Hey there! You still alive?”
“I love you,” I slurred as I phoned my wife from the pub.
“I love you too,” came the reply.Read More »Wrong number
I keep an identical glass of vodka next to the water on my bedside table for a refreshing morning game of Russian Roulette.