A jockey was having a hard time bringing his talking horse to the race
“Do even want to go to the race” the jockey saidThe horse replied “Nay”
Animal Jokes
Animal jokes that are the cat’s pajamas. From dogs and cats to cows, penguins and the odd talking parrot, this collection is clean enough for kids and silly enough for everyone else. Perfect for a quick giggle or a groan-worthy pun to share with fellow animal lovers.
I asked my local butcher if he had a sheep’s head?
He said “no it’s just the way I part my hair”
Isn’t it so fucking cool that birds are dinosaurs?
Like you look at the history books and go back millions of years to the dinos. There are massive herbivores the size of buildings. There… Read More »Isn’t it so fucking cool that birds are dinosaurs?
She won’t admit it, but I’m sure my wife’s favorite sex position is “trick-dog style.”
It’s where I sit up and beg, then she rolls over and plays dead.
For Trading Dec 20th
For Trading December 20thDJIA, NAZ & S&P New HighsNKE BEATSTSLA NEW ALL-TIME HIGH, again!Initial Unemployment Claims Highest Since September 2017Join Us Every Day, Link BelowToday’s… Read More »For Trading Dec 20th
The best thing about being an abortion doctor
You don’t have to buy dog food
A snake walks into a bar
the bartender ask, “How’d you do that?”
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Nobody fucking cares
Someone left the zebras cage open in the middle of the night and he escaped and ran away to a local farm…
Early the next morning he approached an old hen saying,”What do you do around here?”The hen replied,”I lay eggs for the Farmers breakfast.”The zebra then… Read More »Someone left the zebras cage open in the middle of the night and he escaped and ran away to a local farm…
Whats the difference between you and a sick Mallard?
One’s a sick duck, the other’s a dick suck
Why do horse-girls like horses so much?
Because it’s the only stable relationship they’ll ever have!
A farmer walk into a bar [LONG]
A farmer walks into a bar asks for a pint of beer. The bartender brings the man his beer, and walks away. As the farmer… Read More »A farmer walk into a bar [LONG]
What do you call a gay dog
A golden receiver
What happens if a cow drinks her own milk?
It goes in one end and out the udder.
A woman goes to buy a parrot
She sees three parrots with prices 100$, 120$ and 10$.She asks the shopkeeper “why is the third one very cheap?”The shopkeeper says “Because he used… Read More »A woman goes to buy a parrot
How does an elephant hide in a strawberry patch?
He paints his toenails red (duh). Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch?!?
What did the egg say to the egg next to it when it came out of the chicken?
Bro, I just got laid
Why I love this community, this player revived my horse after he accidentally downed it
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I like my women like i like my chicken
Dead and stuffed inside of a freezer
Why didn’t the chicken cross the road
because it got hit by a car
A friend of mine just improved one of my all time favorites.
Why don’t you ever ever see elephants hiding in trees?Because they are very good at itWhy do some elephants paint their balls red?So they can… Read More »A friend of mine just improved one of my all time favorites.
Did you hear about the horse who married a prostitute?
He was a one-trick pony.
What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?
An affront to God and man.
Donald Duck was walking trough Mario’s castle
When He saw the princess He said:Hi Daisy!To wich She replied:I’m Peach Donald.
I hate the musical Cats, so I’m loving these reviews
Seeing the movie so panned is just meowsic to my ears.
A colored pencil cat by Patricia Otero
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Anyone ever wonder how the donkey became the symbol of the Democratic Party?
It’s the Republican Party that’s full of jackasses.
Why don’t blind people skydive?
It scares the hell out of the dog.
Dogs are either one of two things…
A bitch or a son of a bitch
How is Shawarma in your city?
I live in Hyderabad and shawarma here is a classic cheap Lebanese fusion. its usually rolled in either a samoli bun (french bun), rumali roti,… Read More »How is Shawarma in your city?