How to make crime rates drop to 0%?
They would. If government makes everything legal.
Fun jokes
Funny jokes for every mood, all gathered in one place. This is the heart of TheFun.Net, a growing collection of the best jokes we have found and loved, from quick one-liners to longer stories worth the read. New funny jokes land here all the time, so there is always a fresh reason to smile.
In Italy, children don’t leave milk and cookies for Santa.
Instead, they leave him elfredo.
If I purchased some land for you near a swamp…
then I’d make sure to buy you a bayou by you then say, “bye you”
Yo mama so dumb…
She thought blender was a cooking app!
I’ve recently been asking people what LGBTQ means
No ones been able to give me a straight answer yet
I left a chocolate bar in the cupboard too long and it’s gone mouldy.
Life on Mars confirmed.
I wasn’t going to visit my family this December, but my mom promised to make me Eggs Benedict.
So I’m going home for the hollandaise.
A Safety warning notice in a factory for female workers:
A Safety warning notice in a factory for female workers: “If your skirt is long, stay away from the engines and If it is short,… Read More »A Safety warning notice in a factory for female workers:
DO NOT TRANSLATE “SURFACE” INTO SWEDISH ?????
Please sweden I didn’t do anything
The tallest animals in the zoo don’t even want to be there…
They were giraffeted.
2 drunkards walking down a street and suddenly sidestep a pile of runny brown on the pavement
One says ‘what a waste, a good helping of peanut butter thrown on the street’The other says ‘pff that’s not peanut butter! It’s obviously a… Read More »2 drunkards walking down a street and suddenly sidestep a pile of runny brown on the pavement
Orion’s belt is just a big waist of space…
Sorry, I know that joke is lame…3 stars
I call my penis the Canadian
Because it curls when it gets cold.
So there were two eggs in a pot.
The first egg says, “Look I have a crack!”The second egg says, “I’m not hard yet”
The bad sonic trailer is most likely a publicity stunt.
Before you say or in this case, think anything, I want to say that this is the first time a movie studio has listened to… Read More »The bad sonic trailer is most likely a publicity stunt.
What’s the difference between a jacket and a sweater?
A jacket is something to wear when you’re cold.A sweater is what you wear when your Mom is cold.
Sour pharmacist
So, my friend was going to the drugstore, and I asked if he would be so kind as to pick up a box of finely… Read More »Sour pharmacist
I’m thinking of replacing the heads on my toms. Is fiberskyn a good choice?
I’ve had a drum kit for ten years now and haven’t changed the heads or anything. Also, should I replace both heads or is just… Read More »I’m thinking of replacing the heads on my toms. Is fiberskyn a good choice?
What happened when Albert Einstein silenced his phone?
He won the no bell prize.
What kind of murderer has moral fiber?
A cereal killer.
I told my friends I was gonna go on HALO for a bit in 2007.
I just came back from a High Altitude Low Opening jump for 2019.
Whats the most common reasons why musicians go to jail?
For Hitting A Minor
I went to a job interview today…
The interviewer had pictures of himself holding up dead alligators, Nascar posters, and a picture of himself wearing a confederate flag shirt on his wall.… Read More »I went to a job interview today…
How do you know if you’re a shy pooper?
Whether or not you give a sh*t
TRP can’t define Alpha in a helpful way CMV
The biggest question anyone who enters TRP, right after ‘how do I get women to fuck?’ is ‘how can I be alpha?’ so this naturally… Read More »TRP can’t define Alpha in a helpful way CMV
I can see 2 weeks into the future.
Yeah, I have 2020 vision
Jokes
What’s the difference between someone who doesn’t understand figures of speech, and the Grinch?The first takes things literally. The other takes things, literally!The first takes… Read More »Jokes
We all know where the Big Apple is
But do we know where Minneapolis
Remember when picking up women
It’s the thot that counts