I have a friend who circumsises elephants.
It doesn’t pay much, but the tips are huge!
thefun
A guy walks into a bar and asks for a beer “That’ll be fivedollars”, says the bartender, and the guy throws 20 quarters ontothe floor. Reluctantly, the bartender picks up the coins and servesthe beer.
The next day, the guy comes into the bar, asks for a beer, throws 20 quarters onto the floor, etc.The next day, again.On the fourth… Read More »A guy walks into a bar and asks for a beer “That’ll be fivedollars”, says the bartender, and the guy throws 20 quarters ontothe floor. Reluctantly, the bartender picks up the coins and servesthe beer.
A man asks his wife, “What would you do if I won thelottery?” She replied, “I’d take half then leave you.”
I told my husband this joke and he said, “If I won the lottery, I’d give you the world, mi vida,” and gave me a… Read More »A man asks his wife, “What would you do if I won thelottery?” She replied, “I’d take half then leave you.”
What’s the difference between a boner and a bonus?
Your wife will never refuse an opportunity to blow your bonus.
Job interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
Me: I would say my biggest weakness is listening.
I haven’t understood a single joke since this quarantine started.
They must all be inside jokes.
A hen lays a shockingly huge egg.
News reporters visit the hen for an interview. “This is amazing,” they tell the hen, “a two pound egg, that’s unheard of! Do you have… Read More »A hen lays a shockingly huge egg.
My epileptic son loves our new Christmas Tree
You should see how excited he gets when we turn on the lights.
A father puts his 3-year old daughter to bed. His daughter wanted to say a prayer before sleeping, so the father listened.
“God bless mommy, God bless daddy, God bless Grandma, Good bye grandpa” The father asked “why did you say good bye grandpa?” The little girl… Read More »A father puts his 3-year old daughter to bed. His daughter
wanted to say a prayer before sleeping, so the father
listened.
Why don’t black people ever go on cruises?
They’re not falling for that one again.