Trump
Odds of the British press IQ puzzle Donald Trump came to London, and met Queen Elizabeth. Trump asked the queen saying, “Your Majesty, I find… Read More »Trump
thefun
16 year old Trump just had sex
Young Trump: Dad, dad! I just had sex for the first time!Trump senior: thats great my son, you are a winner! Come, sit and tell… Read More »16 year old Trump just had sex
I made a roulette, its about the amount my parents are going to give their godchildren, I decided to tweak it a bit
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A man with window cleaning gear knocks at the door.
An elderly woman opens.”Did you order window cleaning service?””Yes. Come on in!”A few minutes later a man with window cleaning gear knocks at the door.”Good… Read More »A man with window cleaning gear knocks at the door.
To all the new trainers trying to be the very best,
I’ve been playing competitive Pokemon for a long time, primarily doubles and VGC, and would like to offer advice for new players. Whether you are… Read More »To all the new trainers trying to be the very best,
Excuses are like assholes…
Some people have really nice ones.
What do you call the last surviving member of a royal family?
The Epic Victory Royal.
I farted and blamed it on the dog.
It was a lie of emission.
I hate phone sex
Once the phone is in, you can’t even hear what the other person is saying.
a horse, a pediatrician and a fish walk into a bar
the horse stands in place, the fish dies and pediatrician just missed his shift
What’s the difference between masterbation and a hand job
Single player vs local Co op
Guys, don’t pee in the woods….
You’d piss mother nature off.
TIL: bumblebees can fly higher than Mount Everest
In retrospect, this was pretty obvious considering that Mt. Everest can’t fly
My uncle doesn’t like us lighting crackers on special occasions..
He says we’re burning money.
What did the pretentious underground portion of a house say to the floors above it at an EDM festival?
“I wonder what the bass meant?”
Son: What was George Washington Carver most well known for?
Dad: Carving Mount Rushmore?
Knock knock. Who’s there? Narcoleptic. Narcoleptic who?
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
I think my dog ate all of the a scarbble tiles
He keeps dropping hints around the house
Try and name a better duo than me and procrastination
Go ahead, I’ll wait
Doctor: During your surgery we accidentally amputated your genitals
Patient: WTF! Doctor: Ma’am, you need to calm down.Does this work? Not sure if it’s clear that the patient is a male originally. Should I… Read More »Doctor: During your surgery we accidentally amputated your genitals
In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Louisiana State University .
On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed,… Read More »In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Louisiana State University .
SSD questions
Going to build my first PC in a few days, so I’ve got just a few questions about SSDs.Is the 256gb ADATA SX8200 Pro a… Read More »SSD questions
I’m tired of the term whistleblower.
Can we all start using the term Snitchbitch instead?
Where does a king keep his armies?
In his sleevies.
My mother who left me when I was 3 recently started working at my school
I knew she’d end up in hell
My wife says I’m always repeating myself.
My wife says I’m always repeating myself
The Left media need to decide on a strategy to tackle the influence of the Right media.
If you think about all the celebrities, movie stars, sports stars, comedians, all the late night shows, you’d think conservatives would have no chance.But in… Read More »The Left media need to decide on a strategy to tackle the influence of the Right media.
SATAN: I need more ideas on how to torture people
DEMON: Tell them they’re gonna watch Speed and put on Speed 2: cruise control insteadSATAN: What the fuck Morris, I love that.
There’s a creature in Scotland that looks just like the Loch Ness Monster.
It’s the likeness monster.
My dad still laughs at the way he found out I was comming
My dad still laughs at the way he found out I was coming…After that butt dial I now leave my phone on the night stand.