I got kicked out of a hospital after saying to a Covid-19 patient..
I got kicked out of a hospital after saying to a Covid-19 patient.. Stay positive
thefun
The prostitute dressed again and said, “It was a business doing…
The prostitute dressed again and said, “It was a business doing pleasure with you.”
Onion rings are Vegetarian donuts
Onion rings are Vegetarian donuts
I lost my Pizza cutter so I used my Bryan Adams Cd..
I lost my Pizza cutter so I used my Bryan Adams Cd.. Cuts Like a Knife
Tequila: Liquid that won’t change your life but it’s worth a shot.
Tequila: Liquid that won’t change your life but it’s worth a shot.
Doctor : at first glance it appears that you have a gunshot…
Doctor : at first glance it appears that you have a gunshot wound to the chest, but we’ll have to run a Covid test to… Read More »Doctor : at first glance it appears that you have a gunshot…
I exercise in the morning before my brain figures out what the…
I exercise in the morning before my brain figures out what the hell I’m doing
Does anyone know a cure for sex addiction?
Does anyone know a cure for sex addiction? I’ve tried fucking everything
I got arrested for downloading the whole Wikipedia.
I got arrested for downloading the whole Wikipedia. I told them I could explain everything.
Two men are robbing a liquor store… One says, ‘Is this whisky?’…
Two men are robbing a liquor store… One says, ‘Is this whisky?’ ‘Yes’, the other replies, ‘but not as whisky was wobbing a bank’
Doctors advice
My doctor told me I have to give up half my sex life. I asked which half, thinking about it or talking about it?
Playing doctors and nurses with the wife in the bedroom last…
Playing doctors and nurses with the wife in the bedroom last night didn’t go very well. Especially when I diagnosed her as clinically obese.
I took viagra when I got to the office today.
I took viagra when I got to the office today. I’m working hard now.
I opened my electric bill and my water bill at the same time- I…
I opened my electric bill and my water bill at the same time- I was shocked!!
I was watching my wife make her breakfast one morning, and…
I was watching my wife make her breakfast one morning, and noticed that she made way too many trips to get each of the items… Read More »I was watching my wife make her breakfast one morning, and…
Mom: What did you do at school today?
Mom: What did you do at school today? Me: We did a guessing game Mom: But I thought you had a math exam. Me: That’s… Read More »Mom: What did you do at school today?
What do sex and the U.S.
What do sex and the U.S. Military have in common? When you pull out at the wrong time you end up wasting 20 years and… Read More »What do sex and the U.S.
Accordion to a recent survey, 7 out of 10 people don’t notice…
Accordion to a recent survey, 7 out of 10 people don’t notice when a word in a sentence is replaced by a musical instrument.
Wife was massaging her husband’s head.
Wife was massaging her husband’s head. Wife : you always ask for a head massage. Wonder who gave it to you before marriage. Husband :… Read More »Wife was massaging her husband’s head.
If you ever feel lonely, buy stocks.
If you ever feel lonely, buy stocks. You will have company
What’s the difference between USA and USB?
What’s the difference between USA and USB? One connects to your devices and gathers your personal data, and the other is an industry standard.
OMG guys, you won’t believe this but James Bond just came into…
OMG guys, you won’t believe this but James Bond just came into the bar I work at and ordered a drink I’m literally shaking right… Read More »OMG guys, you won’t believe this but James Bond just came into…
Police arrested a time traveller from 2018.
Police arrested a time traveller from 2018. He still can’t believe that he was arrested for not wearing a mask in a bank.
I needed a password eight characters long.
I needed a password eight characters long. I went with SnowWhiteAndTheSevenDwarves
So much nudity online these days . . . . . . sometimes I just…
So much nudity online these days . . . . . . sometimes I just sit in front of my laptop shaking my fist.
My therapist says I have a problem trusting people.
My therapist says I have a problem trusting people. Or at least she claims she’s my therapist.
Sat down in a restaurant to eat dinner last night, and the…
Sat down in a restaurant to eat dinner last night, and the waiter asked if I’d like to hear today’s special. I said yeah He… Read More »Sat down in a restaurant to eat dinner last night, and the…
A wise man once told me to never give up on my dreams.
A wise man once told me to never give up on my dreams. That is why I keep sleeping.
I got a world map for my wall, I’m going to put pins in all the…
I got a world map for my wall, I’m going to put pins in all the places I’ve traveled to … … but first, I… Read More »I got a world map for my wall, I’m going to put pins in all the…
I found an erectile dysfunction group online, it looks fun.
I found an erectile dysfunction group online, it looks fun. It can’t be hard to join