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thefun

awkward

If you think buying condoms is awkward, you should try returning them.

ready

Husband 1: Why do u take your wife only to night clubs? Husband 2: Buddy, by the time she gets ready no other place is… Read More »ready

inside

It’s not about what’s on the outside, it’s about what’s on the inside.. Especially if you’re a fridge.

got married

A simpler, more believable theory is that all the dinosaurs got married and just quit having sex all together..

feelings

Men have feelings too. For example, right now I feel hungry. So go make me a sandwich before I feel angry! I’ll need my energy… Read More »feelings

not looking

I wonder if the saying “You’ll find love when you’re not looking for it” applies to money too? Because let me be clear …..I’m NOT… Read More »not looking

advice

Guys, if you want your relationship to last, learn these six words: “You’re right. I’m wrong. I’m sorry.”

small

The good thing about smart cars is, if you get bored with the color, you can buy a bottle of nail polish and change it.

Christmas period

Tampax has announced that they will be removing the string from tampons and replacing it with tinsil. This is for the Christmas period only.

medical team

How many perverts does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. But it takes an expert medical team to remove it.

his wife

A teacher was teaching her class the differences between right and wrong. “Here is an example children” she said. “If I were to go into… Read More »his wife

next level

Look.. I know we’ve only been seeing each other for a couple of weeks, but I think it’s time we take our relationship to the… Read More »next level

who hasn’t

Mama Bear: “Someone’s been sleeping in my bed!” Papa Bear: “Who hasn’t, you whore?!?”

my eyes are here

I know how women feel, I’ve had pair of breast tattooed on my forehead and now it’s like… Hellooo, my eyes are down here!

I am..

  • by

Grown up pandas eat for 12 hours a day. In related news, it turns out Iā€™m not fat. Iā€™m a panda.

jealous

Congrats on your secret admirer! Must be nice having someone who’s ashamed to admit they like you!

too much

Me: ‘I”ve decided to stop studying.” Mom -”How come?” Me-”I heard that that someone was shot dead, because he knew too much.”

excuse

heres an excuse for bald men: its not a bald spot it’s a solar panel for a sex machine

movie reviewer

When I go to the movies alone, I take a clipboard so everyone thinks I’m a professional movie reviewer and not an awkward friendless loner.

mistake

I sent texts to the wrong people. Now my wife thinks I’m gonna fuck her, and my girlfriend thinks I work late.

advice

Dear Microsoft, If you had called it “Bang” instead of “Bing,” you’d have destroyed Google. Example: I banged Sofia Vergara last night.

difference

Girls: Age 14, Look 18, Act 21 Guys: Age 21, Look 18, Act 14

old fashioned

people who still call radio stations to request songs are the same people who still update their MySpace profiles

except

saw this girl the other day… She’s so beautiful it’s like in heaven above gaved her everything… well except my phone number