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One-Liners

The best one-liners in one place: short, sharp jokes that land in a single sentence. These quick one-line jokes are perfect for a fast laugh, a text to a friend, or a line to steal for your next toast. We keep adding new ones, so there is always something fresh here to make you groan and grin.

almost

Just because she weighed as much as two women…. doesn’t mean you had a threesome.

no one

I’ve spent the last six months trying to find my Mother-In-Law’s killer, but no one is willing to do it.

easiest way

I’ve discovered, the easiest way to change a flat tire is by not wearing a bra.

tales

When women have a few cocktails, they often discuss a few cock tales.

g-spot

Most womens G-spots are located about 2 inches inside a mans wallet.

waiting game

My wife and I took out life insurance policies on each other — so now it’s just a waiting game.

no caffeine

Drinking coffee with no caffeine is like masturbating with a condom on.

viagraccino

Have you tried Starbucks new hot beverage, Viagraccino? One cup and you’re up all night.