My girlfriend broke up with me for being too ‘un-American’ I saw…
My girlfriend broke up with me for being too ‘un-American’ I saw it coming from a kilometre away.
Dating Jokes
Dating jokes for the hopeful, the hopeless and everyone swiping in between. From first-date disasters to hilarious pickup lines and the mysteries of modern romance, these funny dating jokes will have you laughing instead of crying at your love life. Single or taken, there is something here for you.
My girlfriend broke up with me, she said I was bad at communicating.
My girlfriend broke up with me, she said I was bad at communicating. I didn’t know how to respond.
Filtered
My ex-wife passed away so I went to the cemetery to honor her. I brought a 20 year old bottle of fine scotch and poured… Read More »Filtered
I think my girlfriend has had sixty-one boyfriends and lovers…
I think my girlfriend has had sixty-one boyfriends and lovers before me.! She always calls me her sixty second lover.!!
I remember when I first started dating my wife, I got a hard-on…
I remember when I first started dating my wife, I got a hard-on just watching her eating a banana. Now after ten years of marriage,… Read More »I remember when I first started dating my wife, I got a hard-on…
“How to break up with your girlfriend” A two-step process: Step…
“How to break up with your girlfriend” A two-step process: Step 1: take off your glasses Step 2: say: ‘I’m afraid I can’t see you… Read More »“How to break up with your girlfriend” A two-step process: Step…
Me and the girlfriend went to the restaurant for the first time…
Me and the girlfriend went to the restaurant for the first time in ages. The Waiter said, I am sorry but we are so busy… Read More »Me and the girlfriend went to the restaurant for the first time…
A lady had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter was constantly calling her to get back into the dating world. Finally, she said she’d go out, but didn’t know anyone. Her daughter immediately replied, “Mom, I have someone for you to meet!”
Well, it was an immediate hit.They took to one another and after dating for six weeks, he asked her to join him for a weekend… Read More »A lady had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter was constantly calling her to get back into the dating world. Finally, she said she’d go out, but didn’t know anyone. Her daughter immediately replied, “Mom, I have someone for you to meet!”
Boy wants to start dating a girl
>>Boy wants to start dating a girl Son: “Daddy, I fell in love and want to start dating this awesome girl!” Father: “That’s great, son!… Read More »Boy wants to start dating a girl
I’m going to open a restaurant called “I don’t care”
That way I can finally go to that place my girlfriend is always talking about.
My girlfriend’s dog died, so I tried to cheer her up by getting her an identical one.
It just made her more upset. She screamed at me, “What am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?”
Jewish man sends son to Israel
> > Jewish man sends son to Israel in Joke of the Day A Jewish man decides his son isn’t religious enough, so he pays… Read More »Jewish man sends son to Israel
Talking frog
A young man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, “If you kiss me, I’ll turn into… Read More »Talking frog
My girlfriend threatened to leave me if I didn’t stop pointing out random exits and entrances
I said: “There’s the door”
I’ve been dating this girl who works at the zoo.
I’m pretty sure she’s a keeper.
Got an ice cream for my girlfriend
Best trade i ever made.
“How old is your girlfriend?”
“She’s 52”“Haha, dude, she could be your mom!”“Yeah, actually it’s yours.”
A wise old pirate captain has captured a group of merchant sailors, but he tells them that he will spare their lives if they can answer a question: What is a pirate’s favorite letter?
The first sailor, with a smug look on his face, haughtily walks up to the captain and says “Obviously it’s RRRRRRR!”. The captain slowly shakes… Read More »A wise old pirate captain has captured a group of merchant sailors, but he tells them that he will spare their lives if they can answer a question: What is a pirate’s favorite letter?
My girlfriend accused me of gaslighting her.
I told her she’s crazy, there’s no such thing as gaslighting.
Just like my ex-husband,
The seasons come and go
I wanted to take my girlfriend out, but didn’t know where she would like to go
So I asked her:Guess where we are going for dinner.To McDonald’s?So I took her to McDonald’s.
I am not sure if the thai girl am dating is a guy
but something inside me tells me that she is.
My German girlfriend likes to rate my sexual performances on a scale of 1-10.
Last night we tried anal. She kept yelling 9. That’s the best I’ve ever done.
You: What’s wrong? Girlfriend: Nothing…
I just think it’s funny how you [X reason].You: Haha. I think it’s funny too.100% end an argument. No problem ezpz!
Why is a sketchy Tinder date like a fire?
They both start with a match and end with a burning sensation
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
He flushed the toilet.
The seasons did it just like my ex-husband
They came and went
Girlfriend walks into tk max halfway through the night out. She says….
I won’t be long, I promise.
I’m gay
Lmao I’m not gay my boyfriend took my phone and posted that
I finally got my high school dream girl to find me attractive and to be by girlfriend,,, wanna know how I did it?
I waited about 5 years until she was now divorce and a single mom…