I was going to decline but he told me it was for disabled kids and children with severe learning difficulties.I thought, fuck me, I might… Read More »A charity worker stopped me in the street and asked me if I fancied taking part in a marathon
He finally got something that Obama didn’t get.
She sees three parrots with prices 100$, 120$ and 10$.She asks the shopkeeper “why is the third one very cheap?”The shopkeeper says “Because he used… Read More »A woman goes to buy a parrot
A quarter-pounder with cheese
It hardly seems fair.
Mom: You sure about this? I think you deserve better.Me: But mom, I love her so much!Mom: I’m talking to her.
I use minor scaled and it’s pretty hard to arrange notes.Here’s the MP3 if you want to hear. (Comes with an FLP if anyone wants… Read More »How do i stop my medieval music melodies from sounding like trap beats?
The self-driving chap,He greases his pole and provokes his own sap.Absolved of the need of a quarrelsome wife,He humps himself nightly and lives a great… Read More »Y stands for Yanker…
And I won a gold medal for finishing second in the Olympics.(He’s not technically impeached until third step: senate trial, majority republican senate)
i am trying to write a simple hangman game in c it is only a prototype and when i run my code with my while… Read More »My while loop breaks my program
“Sex?” he asked. “What’s that?”She explained what sex was and he said, “Oh, Tarzan use a hole in the trunk of tree!”Horrified, Jane said, “Oh,… Read More »One day Jane found Tarzan in the jungle. He was lean and muscular and she was very attracted to him. During the course of their conversation, she asked what he did for sex.
JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!
He got evicted.
Let me know if you can see this joke.
He finally won a popular vote
Jason momowa would try to kill it
Why r u here?I just told a joke (my life). START LAUGHING ALREADY!
James and the Giant Peach
I am aiming for 2020 vision.
But a lot of the supporters are still hang up on it.
And it’s a big pho queue
Because politics is a booming business.
r/IdiotsInCars•Posted byu/cpt_dipshit22 hours agodidn’t see that coming View CommentsPlay0:000:00SettingsFullscreen2.9k points118 comments
Monica Lewinsky Volodymyr Zelenky
But only because he’s inpeared.
The interview is going very well, as he is nailing all the questions.The interviewer eventually asks him “Where do you see yourself in 5 years?”The… Read More »A bespectacled man heads in for a job interview
Their white sheets aren’t clean from the last rally yet
He paints his toenails red (duh). Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch?!?
Shortly after take off, he announces “This is your Captain speaking, Thank you for flying with us this morning. The weather is… ” Then suddenly… Read More »Pilot is welcoming the passengers on the plane
Dad: “That’s just how he presents himself.”