Little difference
Before Coffee : I hate everybody After Coffee : I feel good about hating everybody
thefun
Scary times
Those are some scary times to call sick at work. They may put you and everybody else in quarantine
Continually
Having kids is like continually cleaning up after a huge party, that you do not attend
Much better
Life would be so much better if at the end of each day, it asked…. “Would you like to save the changes?”
No chance
A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor’s office. After his checkup, the doctor called the wife into his office alone. He said, “Your husband… Read More »No chance
Conspiracy
They want us to get vaccinated so they can inject us with microchips and track us anywhere. -Sent from my iPhone
Friendly advice
A cop drives past my open garage in California, and notices my plants and grow lamps. He stops and shouts, “You better not be growing… Read More »Friendly advice
Clown
I quit my job at McDonald’s today… Boss was a clown
No balls
I went to a bar full of lesbians…even the pool table didn’t have any balls !
Guess the number
I called a restaurant and ask for a table for two.. he said ” wrong number ” so I said ” I’d like a table… Read More »Guess the number