every picture
I don’t get why people say, “Here’s a picture of me when I was younger.” Every picture is when you were younger.
thefun
someday I will…
I propose we add a day to the week and call it “someday”. Just imagine all the stuff that would get done on that day.
James: My name is Bond.
James: My name is Bond. James bond. Dumbledore: My name is Dumbledore. Brian dumbledore. Wulfric Brian Dumbledore. Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore. Albus Percival Wulfric Brian… Read More »James: My name is Bond.
eating my popcorn
A farmer and a pet rooster went everywhere together. One day they went to a movie and as the farmer got close to the ticket… Read More »eating my popcorn
not on fb
I don’t always tell my mother how much I love her. but when I do, it’s not on facebook!!
welcome to the jungle
I was getting ready to have sex with my girlfriend hazardous and she decided to put on some music I was confused on why the… Read More »welcome to the jungle
autocorect
My phone autocorrected “FUCK YOU, FUCKFACE!” to “Yeah, I can get those reports to you by 9am”
you do now
I walked into a car showroom last night. I said to the salesman, “My wife would like to talk to you about the Volkswagen Golf… Read More »you do now
unrealistic
Porn paints a extremely unrealistic picture of how quickly you can get a plumber over to your house…
what a…
GIRLS put makeup, lots of creams , sexy perfumes & they make the best hairstyle EVER. . . Finally guys look at them and say:… Read More »what a…