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Jokes

  • inside

    It’s not about what’s on the outside, it’s about what’s on the inside..
    Especially if you’re a fridge.

  • got married

    A simpler, more believable theory is that all the dinosaurs got married and just quit having sex all together..

  • feelings

    Men have feelings too. For example, right now I feel hungry. So go make me a sandwich before I feel angry! I’ll need my energy for tonight when I feel horny! See??? Feelings….

  • not looking

    I wonder if the saying “You’ll find love when you’re not looking for it” applies to money too? Because let me be clear …..I’m NOT looking for a million dollars!

  • advice

    Guys, if you want your relationship to last, learn these six words:

    “You’re right. I’m wrong. I’m sorry.”

  • small

    The good thing about smart cars is, if you get bored with the color, you can buy a bottle of nail polish and change it.

  • Christmas period

    Tampax has announced that they will be removing the string from tampons and replacing it with tinsil.
    This is for the Christmas period only.

  • medical team

    How many perverts does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    One.
    But it takes an expert medical team to remove it.

  • his wife

    A teacher was teaching her class the differences between right and wrong. “Here is an example children” she said. “If I were to go into a man’s pocket, take a his wallet and all of his money what would I be?”
    A little boy raised his hand and with a confident smile says, “His wife.”

  • wife’s family

    When a doctor remarked on a new patient’s extraordinarily ruddy complexion, he said, “High blood pressure, Doc. It runs in my family.”
    “Your mother’s side or your father’s?” the doctor asked.
    “Neither,” the patient replied. “It’s from my wife’s family.”
    “Oh, come now,” said the doctor. “How could your wife’s family give you high blood pressure?”
    He sighed. “You oughta meet ’em sometime.”