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Jokes

  • ready

    I always have skis mounted on the roof of my car just in case I flip it and land in the snow.

  • good hangover

    I don’t even call it a hangover anymore. It’s just morning.

  • time to stop

    I keep getting bombarded with emails about penis enlargement.

    I wish my wife would stop it.

  • Ive never caught my penis in my zipper…

    Ive never caught my penis in my zipper…

    See a small penis is too good for something.

  • A taxi driver asked me “Aren’t you going to give me a tip?

    A taxi driver asked me “Aren’t you going to give me a tip?

    I replied “Of course, Don’t work too long into the night”

  • My buddy asked me, “Do you know how the Native Americans said…

    My buddy asked me, “Do you know how the Native Americans said hello?”
    So I say, “How?”

    “Oh, you already knew.”

  • surprise

    Pretty sure I know what my wife’s getting me for my birthday cause when I guessed, “A 3-way?” she got all angry like I ruined the surprise.

  • hidden

    tHis is A VEry Serious tEXt post WITH no hidden MEaning.

  • third

    If the earth is the 3rd planet from the sun, doesn’t that make every country a third world country?

  • so bad

    The economy is so bad Mcdonalds employees are asking customers, Can you afford fries with that?