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Jokes

  • Whats the most common reasons why musicians go to jail?

    For Hitting A Minor

  • I went to a job interview today…

    The interviewer had pictures of himself holding up dead alligators, Nascar posters, and a picture of himself wearing a confederate flag shirt on his wall. I left the interview after only a minute. Too many red flags.

  • How do you know if you’re a shy pooper?

    Whether or not you give a sh*t

  • TRP can’t define Alpha in a helpful way CMV

    The biggest question anyone who enters TRP, right after ‘how do I get women to fuck?’ is ‘how can I be alpha?’ so this naturally leads to a lot of discussion about alphas.Typically, you either get one of two responses:”An alpha is a person who exhibits these traits:”Or”An Alpha is someone sexually successful with women”There are guys with stone cold frame that do not get laid, just like there are guys with hella weak frame that get laid. The second definition helps no one because that’s why they’re asking the question in the first place; they want to get laid.Can we call confident men who don’t get laid “betas?” or should we call the insecure loser a “beta” even though he gets laid? The second definition goes against the first.To TRP: you are not going to be able to create some type of personality that can get consistently laid. I don’t care if it’s a “toolbox,” most of its readers see it as steps to get laid. That’s because it is, and when it doesn’t work, you just claim it as a toolbox.

  • I had a crazy dream that I weighed less than a thousandth of a gram…

    I was like 0mg!

  • I can see 2 weeks into the future.

    Yeah, I have 2020 vision

  • Jokes

    What’s the difference between someone who doesn’t understand figures of speech, and the Grinch?The first takes things literally. The other takes things, literally!The first takes things literally. The other takes things, literally!

  • We all know where the Big Apple is

    But do we know where Minneapolis

  • Remember when picking up women

    It’s the thot that counts

  • A patient calls his old therapist

    Patient: I just feel like I can’t connect with anyone. I’m always the third wheel or being forgotten. No one has any time for me. Therapist: I wonder what is making you feel that, unfortunately I have too many patients right now so I can’t see you.