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What is Donald Trump’s favorite dessert?
Im-Peach Cobbler
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How does a half-American half-Canadian person deal with a home intruder?
Shoot first, apologize later
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Wife: I’m pregnant
Husband: Hi pregnant, I’m DadWife: No you’re not
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I was sitting on the toilet for an hour. Wondering why I’m still on it
When it hit me that time goes by in a flush.
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Why did the polar bear cross the road?
Because of global warming.
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TeamTrees reached their goal of 20,000,000 trees planted on the same day Trump got impeached.
Now millions of people can breathe easier.
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My friend just told me that he’s a compulsive liar.
I don’t believe a word of it.
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How did the sperm walk across the street
Because I put the wrong sock on this morning
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Why is Australia situated in the corner?
Because it’s measuring 90 degrees, that’s hot.