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Dirty Jokes

Dirty jokes for adults only: naughty one-liners, bedroom humor and cheeky stories that are funny, rude and definitely not safe for work.

confused

Ladies..Men think with their penis… So if you see one scratching their crotch,  it means they’re confused.

procedure

Yesterday I went through a costly and painful procedure that required me to have my spine and both testicles removed. Still, I got some fantastic… Read More »procedure

once or twice

My young Secretary was telling me a story today, that she had great sex last night with her boyfriend. But when they were finished, she looked in the box of condoms, but there were only six left out of twelve, so she asked her boyfriend what happened to the other five condoms?
He told her he’d masturbated with them.
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honestly

I was in a coffee shop a couple of weeks ago and I overheard this woman say, “Guys who drive expensive cars have small penises.”… Read More »honestly

not capable

Group sex… For those not capable of getting the job done themselves!!

dates

WHITE WOMEN First date: You get to kiss her goodnight. Second date: You get to grope all over and make out. Third date: You get to have sex, but only in the missionary position.
IRISH WOMEN First Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex. Second Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex. 20th Anniversary: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
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Michelle

Got up extra early to shave my legs because I’m gonna order pizza now. I watch a lot of porn.