enough reach
I don’t want to be a millionaire, I just want enough money to be able to stare off into the distance while pumping gas.
Money Jokes
Money jokes for anyone whose wallet has seen better days. Banks, bills, taxes, the boss who never gives a raise and the eternal quest for a good bargain all get the comedy treatment here. These funny money jokes prove that when you are broke, at least you can still laugh for free.
They say money talks, mine just waves goodbye.
They say money talks, mine just waves goodbye.
taste
I have good taste I just don’t have the money to prove it!
money for sex
Wife: Do you wanna have sex? Me: Yeah, I thought you’d never ask Wife: Ok here’s £40 and there’s a brothel around the corner.
not looking
I wonder if the saying “You’ll find love when you’re not looking for it” applies to money too? Because let me be clear …..I’m NOT… Read More »not looking
his wife
A teacher was teaching her class the differences between right and wrong. “Here is an example children” she said. “If I were to go into… Read More »his wife
ligjter
The new iPad Air will make your wallet very lighter.
I was arrested today over a slight misunderstanding at work.
I was arrested today over a slight misunderstanding at work. Apparently taking your work home is classified as ‘theft’ when you work in a ‘Bank’
To those who say love is more important than money…
To those who say love is more important than money… Have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug?
exotic stare
Vacations are a great way to spend thousands of dollars to stare at your phone in exotic locations.
rates
How Girls Rate Guys: (Looks + money + humor + intelligence) So if you score a 0 on looks and humor, but have a 1… Read More »rates
bankruptcy
I have $.27 in my account…that means I have more money than the whole city of Detroit!
no addiction
After beating my gambling addiction for the last 8 months, I’ve decided to treat myself to a vacation with the money I’ve saved. Las Vegas… Read More »no addiction
I hate people who claim to be helping me but then steal my money !
I hate people who claim to be helping me but then steal my money ! Bloody bank !
wonderful man
Sometime after Sidney died, his widow, Tillie, was finally able to speak about what a thoughtful and wonderful man her late husband had been.
Read More »wonderful man
razor
There is a girl walking up the stairs in a church one day. As the priest is walking by, he looks up and notices that… Read More »razor
offshore
I’ve deposited so much sperm in the sperm bank.. I’ve had to open up an Offshore Wank account..
lap dancing
I don’t understand the point of lap dancing clubs. …If I wanted a woman to take all my money and sexually frustrate me, I’d stay… Read More »lap dancing
Million dollar idea: A bathroom mirror that takes pictures!
Million dollar idea: A bathroom mirror that takes pictures!
g-spot
Most womens G-spots are located about 2 inches inside a mans wallet.
chances
The lottery gives you a 1 in 200 million chance you won’t go to work tomorrow. …Alcohol gives you 1 in 5.
I have a million dollar idea that I will share with the first…
I have a million dollar idea that I will share with the first million people that send me a dollar.
The Senate is investigating deceptive sweepstakes practices.
The Senate is investigating deceptive sweepstakes practices. These companies target the elderly and make them think they will receive a bunch of money, but in… Read More »The Senate is investigating deceptive sweepstakes practices.
I’ve never understood why guys go to strip clubs.
I’ve never understood why guys go to strip clubs. If I wanted someone to flash their tits, come on to me, take my money, then… Read More »I’ve never understood why guys go to strip clubs.
either
If money can’t make you happy, you won’t like poverty either.
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