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Dirty Jokes

Dirty jokes for adults only: naughty one-liners, bedroom humor and cheeky stories that are funny, rude and definitely not safe for work.

picture

I was going to buy some Viagra when the cashier asked what I needed it for…. Without saying anything I whipped out a picture of… Read More »picture

resolution

New Years Resolution: -Date more models. -(Revised) Date more girls. -(Re-revised) Date a girl. -(Re-re-revised) Talk to a girl. -(Re-re-re-revised) Find a girl. -(Re-re-re-re-revised) Cry… Read More »resolution

home alone

I’ve been on vacation all week, with the house to myself. I think my penis just filled a restraining order against my hand.

new game

I’d like to invent a new game. You compare boobs in size, shape, quality and performance. I call it battle of the boobs.

new law

How do we not have a law requiring the cashier to high five you when making a condom purchase?

sounds

Ever wonder if the sound effects in porn is actually just a recording of a fat girl eating a delicious hamburger?

SCORE

I heard some girl having sex moans through my window. in my best mortal kombat voice i could. I yelled FINISH HER!!! I heard alot… Read More »SCORE

not in a mood

I had to laugh last night when my boyfriend said he wasn’t in the mood for sex. As if it’s an option.