One-Liners

The best one-liner jokes: short, clever and funny in a single sentence. Quick laughs you can read and share in seconds.

new way

‘Lite’, the new way to spell ‘light’, now with 20% fewer letters.

The ‘L’ in my luck has been replaced with an ‘F’.

I’m sorry for getting so drunk on your birthday that people thought it was my birthday.

Someone just used my driveway to turn around. Now I’m standing outside with two open beers and a lonley face.

If you are happy and you know it, You probably forgot that tomorow is Monday

I don’t have a smartphone. I have a phone that shows potential, but doesn’t apply itself.

Gyms should offer a membership package where you pay for everyday you don’t go.

I’ve changed my name to Getov, so it sounds like girls are shouting my name during sex.

Having sex for money is illegal but most girls know clever tricks to get around it such as marriage.

There’s no problem that the proper application of alcohol can’t solve.