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If I was a black girl, I’d go to a tanning salon just so I could burst out the front door looking at my arms… Read More »wtf

When people tell me “You’re gonna regret that in the morning” I sleep in til noon, because I’m a problem Solver.

To those who say love is more important than money… Have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug? 

In hell, everyone can see your Google search history.

The recipe might be easy, but a reservation is easier.

The Pink Panther’s To Do list: – To do – To do – To do, to do, to do, to do, to doooo

“MOM I HAVE GOOD NEWS! “What? Did you get an A on your math exam?” “I said I have good news, not a miracle.”

Vacations are a great way to spend thousands of dollars to stare at your phone in exotic locations.

A kid and his father were in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to… Read More »ACTUAL ORIGINAL JOKE:

Actually officer, I prefer to think scotch smells like me.