My kids kept finding all the presents I hid around the house so someone suggested I keep them in the attic.
Now they are crying up there and saying it’s too cold and dark.
Fun jokes
The heart of TheFun.Net: our biggest collection of funny jokes, gathered and polished over the years. From quick one-liners to longer stories, this is where new jokes land first before they find a home in a themed category. Dip in whenever you need a laugh, a joke to steal for the office, or something to send a friend. Fresh humor is added all the time, so it is always worth coming back.
Why’d the shy spy lose his job?
He was too embarrassed about being debriefed.
So there’s this guy drinking at a bar, getting absolutely shit faced
Near the end of the night, after he had a few too many, he pukes all over his shirt. He’s yells out “oh fuck, not… Read More »So there’s this guy drinking at a bar, getting absolutely shit faced
A man runs into a store.
He approaches the shopkeeper and exclaims, “Help! help! I’ve met a beautiful girl, but she’s trapped at the bottom of a well.” The shopkeeper reaches… Read More »A man runs into a store.
4 comrades go to a Soviet hotel for a night during a business trip…
As they walk into their room, 3 of them, whip out some vodka, food and cigarettes and begin to make jokes about the government and… Read More »4 comrades go to a Soviet hotel for a night during a business trip…
Sometimes I wish I was a tiger in the circus jumping through…
Sometimes I wish I was a tiger in the circus jumping through flaming rings of fire, but instead of flaming rings, they were onion rings,… Read More »Sometimes I wish I was a tiger in the circus jumping through…
Rushing for Black tomato gin
I’ve never run a marathon… But I have walked across a parking lot really fast because the liquor store was about to close.
Something fun to do: Go to a yard sale and secretly place a…
Something fun to do: Go to a yard sale and secretly place a dildo in there and hang around to watch people’s reactions.
They say, “revenge is sweet.” They also say, “revenge is a dish…
They say, “revenge is sweet.” They also say, “revenge is a dish best served cold.” I’ve come to realize revenge is probably ice cream.
I think my bathroom mirror is defective.
I think my bathroom mirror is defective. Every morning it’s out of focus.