Want to know a job that isn’t doing very well right now

Archeology it’s in ruins!

Did you hear that Disney+ is making a crossover between Star Wars and Back to the Future where the time machine is half car and half person?

It’s called the Man-DeLorean.

How many Walmarts are in Iran?

None but there are 52 Targets

Adam meets a witch

The witch tells him: “Tell me I am pretty or you will be cursed”!Adam: “Sorry, but I don’t find you attractive.”Witch: “Take that back, or you most surely will be cursed!Adam: “Nope. You’re hideous.”The witch then transformed him into an ant.Witch: “Look where your rudeness brought you! “Adam: “Yeah this sucks, but you still look like a moldy potato.”Witch: “Very well, then. You will remain in this form until you repent and call me pretty!”He is still adamant.

A man with no arms and legs was sun baking on the beach.

A gorgeous blonde was walking past him, stopped for a second with a tang of pity in her eyes.“Have you ever had a hug?” She asked. “No.” So with an “aww”, she gave him a big hug.Two minutes later, another beautiful woman was walking past the man.“Aw look at you honey. Have you ever been kissed?”“No.” He says. She leans down and gives him a passionate kiss.Another few minutes pass and another stunning lady walks past.“Oh you poor thing…Have you ever been fucked?” “No.” “Well you will be soon, the tides coming in.”

What do you call honey bee fetish?


A skeleton walks into a bar,

he orders a beer and a mop

How do you spot a blind man at a nude beach?

“I’m arresting you for illegally downloading the entire wikipedia.”

“Wait, I can explain everything!”

GrAsS fEd BeAst MaNgLeS pOOr wOmAns FaCe!