Elfie
If one of Santa’s helpers takes a picture of himself with his smartphone, is that an “elfie”?
thefun
Preferences
It’s funny how most men prefer specific fats on a woman’s body, while most women prefer specific muscles on a male body.
You’re not
“I’m going to pay for this in the morning,” I slurred after downing a bottle of whiskey. “No you’re not,” said the shop keeper.
Not gently
I went to see a nurse about my concerns my penis is too small. “There’s absolutely nothing there to worry about” She said Fucking bitch,… Read More »Not gently
Stoner thoughts:
Strippers are just married prostitutes. Think about it, they’ll tease you all daym but they’ll NEVER sleep with you.
“Don’t open that wardrobe!” shouted my wife as I was just about…
“Don’t open that wardrobe!” shouted my wife as I was just about to, “Your Christmas present is in there!” “Too late,” I said, pulling open… Read More »“Don’t open that wardrobe!” shouted my wife as I was just about…
Complaints
Being a man is far worse than being a women. Yeh, women get periods, pregnancy and mood swings. But, men have to marry them.
The best sex is “What if we get caught?” sex.
The best sex is “What if we get caught?” sex.
Irony
Isn’t it funny, you stop drinking cause you want to settle down and have kids. Then you have the little fuckers and all you want… Read More »Irony
Story
When Gandhi was studying law at the University College of London, there was a professor, whose last name was Peters, who felt animosity for Gandhi, and because Gandhi never lowered his head towards him, their “arguments” were very common.Read More »Story