Fun jokes

Today Arnold Schwarzenegger turned 66 and his family threw him a party and when he walked in they shouted “Surprise!” his “Another maid is pregnant?”

When my wife picks a restaurant that I don’t like, I just say “oh yeah, that’s where that really cute girl works”.Problem solved.

how guys propose: on one knee. How girls propose: “I’m pregnant!!”

“Can I have a double shot of fireball please?” I slurred. “Dont you think you’ve had enough, ma’am?” “Excuse me!? Listen asshole, I could out-drink… Read More »step out

I hate when I go to uninstall some program, and then they want me to fill out a survey telling them why. Like I just… Read More »it’s me

I told my wife to spin the globe, put her finger on it and wherever it lands that will be the holiday destination. ”Ooooo!” she… Read More »my turn

I had the awkward moment the other day, where my dad decided to come up to me, and said “Son, we need to talk.” Now when he said this, I thought, oh great, here comes the sex talk.
Read More »talk

In a new survey, 60% of women admitted to using sex as a way of controlling their relationships. The other 40% were blatant liars…

Sometimes, my secretary reminds me of my wife. I was unbuttoning her shirt the other day when she said, “Remember, you have a wife.”

Girls are like internet domain names. All the good ones are already taken, so I’m probably going to have to settle for one from a… Read More »strange country