experience
Over the years I’ve learned that everyone has to pay for their own mistakes. Except for the government. We have to pay for theirs too.
Fun jokes
don’t ask
If you have to ask a woman if she came, she didn’t.
ikea
Ghepetto walked in on his son Pinnochio, and nearly died of a heart attack when he saw his son.. Lying under the bed sheets with… Read More »ikea
solver
When people tell me “You’re gonna regret that in the morning” I sleep in til noon, because I’m a problem Solver.
hug
To those who say love is more important than money… Have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug?
hell
In hell, everyone can see your Google search history.
almost cooking
The recipe might be easy, but a reservation is easier.
to do
The Pink Panther’s To Do list: – To do – To do – To do, to do, to do, to do, to doooo
not miracle
“MOM I HAVE GOOD NEWS! “What? Did you get an A on your math exam?” “I said I have good news, not a miracle.”
exotic stare
Vacations are a great way to spend thousands of dollars to stare at your phone in exotic locations.