Fun jokes

My wife asked what I wanted for Valentine’s Day. I said I wanted a blowjob. She’s all, “no silly, something I can buy you.” So… Read More »good

I said to this girl, “Will you be my valentine?” “Talk to the hand,” she replied. “I did,” I said, “but he’s tired of being… Read More »valentine

The garbage man is late. I think he’s been cheating on me with some other piece of trash.

Ever been so tired at work that people thought you were drunk? I hope so because thats the only excuse I have for being drunk… Read More »so tired?

We ask 18-years-olds to make huge decisions about their career and financial future, when a month ago they had to ask to go to the… Read More »month ago

No one’s an atheist 30 seconds before an orgasm.

Facebook is the adult way of having imaginary friends.

Fires tell their kids not to play with Chuck Norris.

These new anti-depressants I got from the doctor are brilliant. I felt much better as soon as I put a dozen in my wife’s food.

Porn is so unrealistic. I’ve been watching for 20 minutes now and no one has checked their phone.