Fun jokes

So the interviewer asked “Where do you see yourself in 5 years?” I responded “Do you see fortune teller on my fucking resume`?!? No you… Read More »fortune teller

I get really fucking pissed off when complete strangers ask me a lot of personal questions. So no… the job interview didn’t go very well.

How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? Ask Hugh Hefner.

My Saturday was going pretty well until I realized it was Sunday

I love watching women’s Curling during the Olympics. It’s the only time I can drink beer while cheering on a woman sweeping a broom…without getting… Read More »without

I pulled my wife bleeding from the wrecked car, as she screamed and pleaded for me to let her have one more shot at parking… Read More »one more

Got a porno the other day, I put it in the DVD player but it was just a dark blurry picture of some guy holding… Read More »holding

Nothing moves faster than a girl untagging herself from an ugly picture.

Insanity is believing your hallucinations are real. Religion is believing other people’s hallucinations are real.

Hello sir, we’re from your internet provider. You’ve recently said that “homosexuality is wrong,” so we’ve blocked you from seeing lesbian porn.