surprise lunch
Put in an official complaint at work the other day after finding someone had shit in my lunchbox, and they immediately launched an investigation. Turned… Read More »surprise lunch
thefun
I just called in sick because I have a cold…. case if beer in…
I just called in sick because I have a cold…. case if beer in my fridge.
He knows when you are sleeping, he knows when your awake, he knows if you’ve been bad or good… Sounds like Santas got Facebook
BBQ rules
We are about to enter the BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity… Read More »BBQ rules
Girl: ok, you hang up. boy: no,you hang up girl: oh LOL, you…
girl: ok, you hang up. boy: no,you hang up girl: oh LOL, you hang up. President Obama: ” Aww both of you hang up.
compare
Whenever somebody says that something is “better than sex”, I always think “better than sex with you maybe”.
You can drown in 2 inches of water.
You can drown in 2 inches of water. I’m not stating facts, but I’m making suggestions.
not enough
Excuse me waiter, I’d like to return my food. It only received 10 likes on Instagram.
search history
When I die I want my internet search history to be read out at my funeral. That way all my friends and family will go… Read More »search history
no chance
Teacher: “don’t get smart with me.” Student: “with you teaching there is no chance of that.”