surprice
So I got a job at McDonald’s recently, and I spent the whole day giving out fake engagement rings with couples’ meals. Best Valentines Day… Read More »surprice
thefun
already
My doctor said that jogging could add years to my life. I didn’t believe him at first, but I went yesterday and I feel ten… Read More »already
on the phone
I heard your house was robbed last week. Are you okay? I heard the robber said you could give him your phone or a blowjob.… Read More »on the phone
difference
Im not saying you shouldnt trust the internet but there is a huge differance between the number of ipads I won and the number of… Read More »difference
do you want?
I just bought a 3D Printer, who wants one? I’ll print you one out.
matches
North Korea Decided Not To Firing Rockets… No One Couldn’t Find The Matches…
movie
A drunk guy was with his girlfriend in a cinema and suddenly, he fell asleep.After a while, he woke up and started screaming ‘MY PENIS,MY… Read More »movie
caller id
the caller I.D. says “unavailable” …then so am I
either
If money can’t make you happy, you won’t like poverty either.
she will tell you
“Dad…” “What?” “How do you know when you’ve met the right woman?” “They tell you, son.”