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I ran a marathon for charity
It was for kids with asthma, i easily finsihed 1st.
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Quasimodo needed a sub bell ringer…
Put an ad in the paper. No one showed up for weeks. Finally a knock on the door. Guy standing there with no arms. Quasi is incredulous, doesn’t think he can do it. Guy begs..”c’mon Quasi, give me a chance…as a handicapped person yourself, you know how hard it is to find work” Quasimodo says, “OK…it’s noon, let’s try you out” They reach the top of the bell tower, the guy crouches down, takes a running start and slams his forehead into the bell. BONG! By the time he hits it 12 times, he’s woozy. Dizzy. CTE symptoms. He stumbles, and falls off the tower and hits the ground. Splat. By the time Quasi gets down the stairs, a crowd has gathered. Someone asks “Does anyone know his name?” Quasi: “I don’t know his name, but his face sure rings a bell”
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Flour, salt, and butter go to a dance.
Butter sees flour and salt dancing in the corner.He walks over to them and asks, “can I cut in?”
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A witch and her friend enter a race. When they get there, the witch’s ride is already there waiting for her. “Huh” the witch’s friend says. “I didn’t know you drive a stick.”
“It’s a broom, actually.” She says.
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What two video games if combined would become the greatest video game ever?
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What do you call a meme that gives you an erection?
ViaBruh
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I ain’t afraid of my wife!
But don’t tell her I said that.
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Two guys are going out to get breakfast. One asks “wanna get a bagel sandwich?”
“A bagel sandwich? That’s way too much bread.”
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I don’t have a girlfriend
But I know someone who would be angry if they heard me say that.
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Tragically, my Korean friend passed away this morning.
He was So Yung.
Jokes
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