Jokes

my girlfriend says her pussy’s like a rose
But I think it looks more like tulips

“Have you ever taken it in the other hole?”
“No way, that would get me pregnant!”

My wife and I split up because of Psychological reasons….

She was Psycho, and I was Logical

How do you call the mouth of a smoker?
the exhaust pipe

I broke up with a girl once because she was having hallucinations.
She said “Carl, I.. can’t see you anymore”… That was weird. I was like- “Babe, I’m standing right here.” then she said “No, you don’t understand… I’m seeing someone else” which was really bizarre because it was just the two of us in the room. I had to break it off after that.

Grey hair is hereditary.
You get it from your children.

Movie ratings are an indication of who gets the girl
Rated G – the prince gets the girl.
Rated PG – the hero gets the girl.
Rated R – the villain gets the girl.
Rated X – everyone gets the girl!

you shouldn’t take my class on reverse psychology

Tired of losing money in the stock market?
Come visit our online casino.

Do you remember before the internet, people thought that the lack of information was the cause of stupidity?

Yeah, well that definitely wasn’t the cause.