-
What did the fish say when he swam into a wall?
Dam.
-
Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer has a little known brother.
Randolf the brown nosed reindeer,he can run as fast as Rudolf, he just can’t stop as quick.
-
Next time when someone asks me to kill a cockroach
-
A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands.
On their wedding night, she told her new husband, “Please be gentle, I’m still a virgin.””What?” said the puzzled groom. “How can that be if you’ve been married 10 times?””Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative. He kept telling me how great it was going to be.Husband #2 was in software services. He was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he’d look into it and get back to me.Husband #3 was from field services. He said everything checked out diagnostically, but he just couldn’t get the system up.Husband #4 was in telemarketing. Even though he knew he had the order, he didn’t know when he would be able to deliver.Husband #5 was an engineer. He understood the basic process, but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.Husband #6 was from finance and administration. He thought he knew how, but he wasn’t sure whether it was his job or not.Husband #7 was in marketing. Although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.Husband #8 was a psychologist. All he ever did was talk about it.
-
My 17 year old brother told me this joke.
Why wasn’t Jesus born in the USA?…God couldn’t find a virgin and 3 wise men.
-
Peace and harmony, that is
-
Where was chicken first fried?
Greece.
-
Out of the 26 letters, only E got presents for Christmas.
The other letters were not-E.
-
Why is Santa Claus always so jolly?
He knows where all the bad girls live.
-
People at our Christmas party were impressed when I showed off my incredibly detailed tattoo, but they didn’t believe me when I tell them I got it done in Madrid.
Nobody expected the Spanish ink precision.
Jokes
Skip to the main content