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Yesterday a bought a pair if shoes from a drug dealer.
Don’t know what he laced them with ’cause I’ve been tripping all day
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My dentist reminded me about my wife’s sensitive gag reflex.
We laughed about it for a while. Then I remembered me and my wife have different dentists.
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I experienced the WORST customer service yesterday at a shop.
I don’t want to mention the name of the shop because I’m not sure how I’m going to proceed. On Wednesday I bought something from this shop. I paid cash for it. I took it home and found out it didn’t work. So today, less than 48 hours later I took it back to the shop and asked if I could get a refund. The girl in the shop told me “NO” even though I still had the receipt. I asked if I could get a replacement instead then. Again this person told me “NO.” I asked to talk to a manager now as I’m really not happy and I explained that I had bought the item, had got it home and it didn’t work. The manager just smiled and told me to my face that I was “OUT OF LUCK.” ??? No refund. No FREE replacement. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrereerr. . I”ll tell you what… I am NEVER buying another Lotto Ticket from there again!!
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When I was a kid, I made a really big sandcastle with my grandma
Unfortunatley, I didn’t impress anyone at the cremation…
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It do be dat goooood
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When a vampire bites someone, they turn into a vampire. If your username bit someone, what would they turn into?
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What’s the difference between a hot potato and a flying pig?
Ones a heated yam, and the other’s a yeeted ham.
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A cop pulls over a car with two priestS. The cop goes over to the car and says “We’re looking for two child molesters.”
The priests look at each other for a moment and reply, “We’ll do it.”
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Some people take Christmas way too serious…
It’s 362 days away and people already have their decorations up!
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Reddit should rename ‘share’ to ‘spreddit’, ‘delete’ to ‘shreddit’ and ‘karma’ to ‘creddit’.
Wait, what do you mean someone already seddit?
Jokes
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