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Job advertising

Join our mid-aged and unfriendly team at an awkward-winning company with more than 1200 employees worldwide gone berserk.

If you are:
– Looking for a whole week of stressful boredom;
– Stopped trying to pretend you like working and not just doing this to pay the bills;
– With no idea what’s the point but still not suicidal enough;

Your responsibilities are:

– Come to work;
– Try not to mentally meltdown at a meeting;
– Make yourself feel useful and doing something of any importance by using some made-up terminology and a proper face expression hiding your utter feel of tediousness;
– Wear a corporate badge while going for the 3rd time in the last hour for a smoke;

We offer:
– Some salary;
– Opportunities for a total career screw-up and wasting precious years from your short and pointless life;
– Fitness card because we need you in a constant pain both physically and mentally;
– Healthy breakfast every Friday consisting of your own recycled faeces collected through the entire workweek;

Send us your not at all mediocre CV with pointless things dressed up to sound somehow important and shit. And a random dick pic.