I’m afraid I’m going to drink during Christmas with my friends who are heavy drinkers.

What can I do? I can’t not go, it would be really messed up because i keep pushing off hanging out on weekends with b.s. excuses and I have no excuse for not hanging out and exchanging gifts during Christmas break. I’ve told them I’m qutting but i can’t ask them not to drink, and seeing them drinking and having fun… I don’t know, just the thought of it is making me feel like I know I’m definitely gonna have 1, then 2 etc… I’m thinking maybe i can go, get drunk, have a carefree night, and then let them know I won’t be able to hang out while drinking ever again, and if we drift apart then so be it. We’ve been close for years and they’re my only friends so i don’t want to just show up–exchange gifts and leave asap, but I also don’t want to get into it about how I can’t be around them drinking at Christmas of all times. I’m really not sure what to do but I think I’m gonna drink and and let them know I’m calling it quits on hanging at bars, clubs and their houses, which always have a ton of booze and people drinking, and just let them know i can only do movies or shows or outings without alcohol from now on. I think my mind is made up and I’m just venting, but this community is really cool and has helped me begin my process of being alcohol-free so maybe i just want some tips or opinions on my situation. Thanks for reading this. Love you guys.IWNDWY- hopefully ever again.