-
An old, beat up sedan rear-ends a shiny, sleek coupe.
The sedan’s owner, an old man, gets out and shuffles to the front of his sedan to examine the damage. A younger couple rushes out of the red coupe, the young man flailing his arms.“You old bastard! Look what you did to my wife’s car!”The woman slaps the young man.
-
What does the pop musician say to the jazz musician?
To the airport please.
-
LPT: Disguising your insecurities as a LPT does not actually make them an LPT.
-
What animal is never hungry at Christmas?
The turkey! It’s always stuffed!
-
Is it possible to recover from Margarine Fondling Syndrome?
My cousin Jeff had it, said he’s feeling butter now.
-
What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say?
Beat it. We’re closed.
-
What do you say to an annoying Muslim?
Ok bomber
-
A measuring cup got sent to prison
He was found guilty in the quart of law for litering
-
A man is out in the Chinese wilderness and he’s hopelessly lost.
It’s been nearly three weeks since he’s eaten anything besides what he couldforage and he’s been reduced to sleeping in caves and under trees.One afternoon he comes upon an old mansion in the woods. It has vinescovering most of it and the man can’t see any other buildings in thearea. However, he sees smoke coming out of the chimney implying someoneis home.He knocks on the door and an old man answers, with a beard almost downto the ground. The old man squints his eyes and says “What do you want?”The man says “I’ve been lost for the past three weeks
-
What do you call a snake that eats too much candy
A snack
Jokes
Skip to the main content