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Funny Jokes

Welcome to TheFun.Net, a growing collection of funny jokes in one place. You will find short one-liners, dirty jokes, bar jokes, marriage jokes and plenty of classics worth sharing. New jokes are added all the time, so pick a category and start laughing. In a hurry? Start with our 300 short jokes and one-liners or the 50 best one-liners. Strictly for adults, there are 200 dirty jokes too.

  • How do you make a pressure cooker bomb?

    Wait this isn’t Google…

  • Why do programmers need glasses?

    So they can see sharp.

  • I want to argue with flat earthers but…

    I just feel like we’re not on a level playing field

  • Chemists

    Two chemists walk into a bar. The bartender says, “What can I get you?” The first chemist responds, “I’d like some H2O.” The second chemists says, “I’d like some H2 — wait, we aren’t at work, why’d you say it like that? I’d like some water too, please.” The first chemist mutters to himself, “Damn! My assassination plot failed.”

  • Why don’t cows get pedicures?

    Because they lack toes!

  • A texas woman chokes on some food.

    Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant. While having a bite to eat, they talk about their moonshine operation.Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress. One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, ‘Kin ya swallar?’ The woman shakes her head no.Then he asks, ‘Kin ya breathe?’ The woman begins to turn blue, and shakes her head no.The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress, yanks down her drawers, and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue. The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm, and the obstruction flies out of her mouth.As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly back to his table. His partner says, ‘Ya know, I’d heerd of that there ‘Hind Lick Maneuver’ but I ain’t niver seed nobody do it!’

  • What is your superpower?

    -what is your superpower? •”Hindsight” -That wouldn’t help much •”yes, I see that now”

  • It’s the most wonderful time of the year

    View CommentsPlay0:000:00SettingsFullscreen

  • What is better than a woman?

    -It is 2 woman (Slightly hearable lesbian porn sounds.)

  • Carbon monoxide from dryer

    So dryers emit a lot of carbon monoxide, right? What if I were to capture some of that in a garbage bag and tie it over my head? I heard that carbon monoxide lets you go quietly, maybe that would dull my survival instinct enough to see Jesus? Or would it be impossible to capture enough CO to do the deed?

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